Fuck Nancy Grace!
Feb. 5th, 2008 02:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thebitterguyAs some of you may recall, I had a sleep study a few months ago. Wonderful experience, really. Well, after dodging followups for a few weeks, I went and got the bad news: I stop breathing approximately 36 times an hour while sleeping (which is a moderate case of Sleep Apnea,/a>).
I apparently suffer from something called a "small throat", which if you've ever eaten with me will be a bit of a shock. So the doc is suggesting I get a CPAP machine (or as![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
eyebeams calls it, a Darth Vader machine).
I'll admit, my nighttime breathing habits are curious ones; as anyone who's ever slept in the same room as me can attest, if you don't get to sleep first, you don't get to sleep. So, I'm gonna go next week and get myself a CPAP machine. Apparently my health plan covers a fuckload of it, but I suspect that's from the same amount as my massage. Dammit!
Anyway, I have an appointment to get fitted for one next week, which apparently takes an hour and a half (Fun!). After that, I get to try and then go in for another sleep study to see how well it's working. Can you smell the excitement?
Man. Why can't I just have lasers shot into my esophagus*?
Amusing thing: My Pulmonary specialist's first name is Tetsuo. He gives the patter for "your breathing is bad and here's how you can fix it" so smoothely I think he's given it a million times before (and I suspect he's got shares in the CPAP company). But everytime I looked at his certificates I flashed back to Akira.
Awkward.
Anyway, there's lots of fun to be had. Apparently I'll be on the machine until I need another machine to assist my breathing, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. So it will be another lifelong accessory, just like my wife.
*Rherotical question!
I apparently suffer from something called a "small throat", which if you've ever eaten with me will be a bit of a shock. So the doc is suggesting I get a CPAP machine (or as
eyebeams calls it, a Darth Vader machine). I'll admit, my nighttime breathing habits are curious ones; as anyone who's ever slept in the same room as me can attest, if you don't get to sleep first, you don't get to sleep. So, I'm gonna go next week and get myself a CPAP machine. Apparently my health plan covers a fuckload of it, but I suspect that's from the same amount as my massage. Dammit!
Anyway, I have an appointment to get fitted for one next week, which apparently takes an hour and a half (Fun!). After that, I get to try and then go in for another sleep study to see how well it's working. Can you smell the excitement?
Man. Why can't I just have lasers shot into my esophagus*?
Amusing thing: My Pulmonary specialist's first name is Tetsuo. He gives the patter for "your breathing is bad and here's how you can fix it" so smoothely I think he's given it a million times before (and I suspect he's got shares in the CPAP company). But everytime I looked at his certificates I flashed back to Akira.
Awkward.
Anyway, there's lots of fun to be had. Apparently I'll be on the machine until I need another machine to assist my breathing, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. So it will be another lifelong accessory, just like my wife.
*Rherotical question!
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Date: 2008-02-05 08:54 pm (UTC)