Guidelines for Cats.

[thebitterguy]

If you have to throw up, get to a chair quickly. If you cannot manage in time, get to an Oriental rug. If there is no Oriental rug, shag is good. When throwing up on the carpet, make sure you back up so that it is as long as the human's bare foot.

Among many others. It explains a lot.

Comments

[racing-girl.livejournal.com]

this is my cata to a "T"

"Walking:
As often as possible, dart quickly and as close as possible in front of the human, especially on stairs, when they have something in their arms, in the dark, and when they first get up in the morning. This will help their coordination skills."

[thebitterguy]

It's the cooking one that makes me nod my head sagely; just behind the left heel.