Business Casual: a story
Jun. 8th, 2006 09:59 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thebitterguyI had cat fur on my pants, so I asked her to clean my pants with a lint brush. She brushed over my bum, when she noticed something.
"You have a hole in your pants," she said.
"Ah, no. I just got these pants. Where is it?"
"It split along the seam on your bum." Her voice moved, as she was looking at the break.
"Crap. How big is it? Would you say it's a hole, or more of a rift? Or possibly a gap?" A horrid thought crossed my mind. "Can you see my underwear?"
"I can see Uranus."
"How is that possible? I'm wearing underwear!"
"No, the planet Uranus. I can see it through the hole in your pants. You have a hole in Space/Time in your pants." She did not sound upset by this revelation.
"A hole in the space time continuum!? In my pants?! How the hell do you fix something like that?"
"Don't worry," she said. "I have a quantum string in my purse."
THE END
"You have a hole in your pants," she said.
"Ah, no. I just got these pants. Where is it?"
"It split along the seam on your bum." Her voice moved, as she was looking at the break.
"Crap. How big is it? Would you say it's a hole, or more of a rift? Or possibly a gap?" A horrid thought crossed my mind. "Can you see my underwear?"
"I can see Uranus."
"How is that possible? I'm wearing underwear!"
"No, the planet Uranus. I can see it through the hole in your pants. You have a hole in Space/Time in your pants." She did not sound upset by this revelation.
"A hole in the space time continuum!? In my pants?! How the hell do you fix something like that?"
"Don't worry," she said. "I have a quantum string in my purse."
THE END
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no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 02:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 05:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 02:52 pm (UTC)Totally OT: tell Cynra that the leafy invasion is probably Chinese Elm, and you wanna get that out of there before it turns into a forest (which it will do in about, oh, five minutes, given half the chance). This nifty dealie (http://www.canadiantire.ca/assortments/product_detail.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=1408474396669684&ASSORTMENT%3C%3East_id=1408474396670271&bmUID=1149778264462&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524443258116&assortment=primary&fromSearch=true) would do the trick. Alex's mom got one to dig up her Chinese Elm weeds, and it works like a charm because it gets the whole rosette (unlike regular weeding tools).
no subject
Date: 2006-06-09 02:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-06-08 10:41 pm (UTC)That, quite honestly, was one of the most amusing pieces of text I've ever read.
no subject
Date: 2006-06-09 02:37 pm (UTC)