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May. 3rd, 2002 09:06 am(Intro: Paul Shaffer-esque jingle:
Spider-Man! Superman! Batman too!
It's time for Superhero MOooOOOvviiiiies!
Superhero Movies!)
Hey there, kids!
Well, you know that Spider Man's coming out today (you ever wonder why people were surprised when Northstar came out of the closet? Hell, I figure the normal response to a guy leaping around in tights is "you're NOT gay?", but I'm not even talking about that kind of closet).
So I thought I'd just hop on the wayback and talk about My Favourite Superhero Films!
(tttaaaa Daaah!)
#1: Superman II. My favourite. Sure, the first was good. But this one had him fighting supervillains, ripping apart Metropolis. The love story was lost on me then (and really doesn't make me that impressed now), but the superhero action rocks. Terrance Stamp as Zod just rocks. He gnaws on the scenery with Super strength. Damn
The Evil Kryptonians, BTW, weren't NEARLY as lame as Atom Man from IV.
#2: Batman. You know, this was my first inkling that fans are stupid. "Hey, Tim Burton's cast Michael Keaton! Didn't he make some comedies! Get them!" My greatest sadness in life (well, #23 on the list) is that I lost my 'Bite me, Fanboy!' button. Fucking fans.
So, yeah, it came out, made $50 Million, and we loved it. Even comic book store owners. I hate it when people talk and talk from behind a counter like it's a fucking pulpit. No, you goof, just because you figured out how many copies of Z-Dogs to order (wait, I didn't get one: You DIDN'T figure out how many to order) doesn't mean you aren't a total idiot!
Anyway, great movie. Nicholson as Joker, Keaton as Batman, and Billy Dee as Havey Dent (but DAMN, Billy Dee got white by Batman Forever).
#3. X-Men. They figured out that sometimes, you must get rid of the stupid stuff to make the story. So they had Wolverine and The Team. Maybe The Team will get more screen time next film. Maybe it'll be more Wolverine. Hey, who knows. It's cool, anyway.
And Hugh Jackman was still too tall to play Wolverine.
#4 Superman. John Williams, Marlon Brando, "You've got me? Who's got YOU?", Gene Hackman ("You don't have to tell ME about the fucking Superman movies!"). Yeah, baby.
#5: Blade. Because it was a Kung Fu vampire killah flick. The main villain sucked (okay, on WHAT planet can a vampire played by STEPHEN DORFF take out a vampire played by Udo Kier, who I believe IS a vampire? Not on MY planet, bucky!), but overall good flick. I still haven't seen the sequel, but the day is young.
Anyway, I'd continue on, but I don't really like anymore superhero movies (the Flash show was cool, though) and I have to catch a bus. Fucking commute.
Spider-Man! Superman! Batman too!
It's time for Superhero MOooOOOvviiiiies!
Superhero Movies!)
Hey there, kids!
Well, you know that Spider Man's coming out today (you ever wonder why people were surprised when Northstar came out of the closet? Hell, I figure the normal response to a guy leaping around in tights is "you're NOT gay?", but I'm not even talking about that kind of closet).
So I thought I'd just hop on the wayback and talk about My Favourite Superhero Films!
(tttaaaa Daaah!)
#1: Superman II. My favourite. Sure, the first was good. But this one had him fighting supervillains, ripping apart Metropolis. The love story was lost on me then (and really doesn't make me that impressed now), but the superhero action rocks. Terrance Stamp as Zod just rocks. He gnaws on the scenery with Super strength. Damn
The Evil Kryptonians, BTW, weren't NEARLY as lame as Atom Man from IV.
#2: Batman. You know, this was my first inkling that fans are stupid. "Hey, Tim Burton's cast Michael Keaton! Didn't he make some comedies! Get them!" My greatest sadness in life (well, #23 on the list) is that I lost my 'Bite me, Fanboy!' button. Fucking fans.
So, yeah, it came out, made $50 Million, and we loved it. Even comic book store owners. I hate it when people talk and talk from behind a counter like it's a fucking pulpit. No, you goof, just because you figured out how many copies of Z-Dogs to order (wait, I didn't get one: You DIDN'T figure out how many to order) doesn't mean you aren't a total idiot!
Anyway, great movie. Nicholson as Joker, Keaton as Batman, and Billy Dee as Havey Dent (but DAMN, Billy Dee got white by Batman Forever).
#3. X-Men. They figured out that sometimes, you must get rid of the stupid stuff to make the story. So they had Wolverine and The Team. Maybe The Team will get more screen time next film. Maybe it'll be more Wolverine. Hey, who knows. It's cool, anyway.
And Hugh Jackman was still too tall to play Wolverine.
#4 Superman. John Williams, Marlon Brando, "You've got me? Who's got YOU?", Gene Hackman ("You don't have to tell ME about the fucking Superman movies!"). Yeah, baby.
#5: Blade. Because it was a Kung Fu vampire killah flick. The main villain sucked (okay, on WHAT planet can a vampire played by STEPHEN DORFF take out a vampire played by Udo Kier, who I believe IS a vampire? Not on MY planet, bucky!), but overall good flick. I still haven't seen the sequel, but the day is young.
Anyway, I'd continue on, but I don't really like anymore superhero movies (the Flash show was cool, though) and I have to catch a bus. Fucking commute.
